the year's end...........

A year has gone by and we soon will be welcoming 2012 into our lives. Well, for some it may be a welcoming feeling and maybe not for others. It's different for everyone and how they look at the prospects and the offering of a new year. It's somewhat likened to a 'new slate' for many and that's OK. That may in fact be a good thing for some, allowing themselves to 'begin again'. It may be exactly what they need. A new slate is good in terms of allowing ourselves to look at how we want to make different choices that will help to build the architecture of the life that we are in fact creating.

I'm not so much about New Years resolutions, but in fact like to resolve to make a resolution each and every day to live the best life possible. That might sound too over the top' for some, but for me its easier than making a big set of resolutions once a year and then feeling let down if or when I don't follow through with some of them. It tends to feel too 'big' for me at the beginning of each year so I choose instead to make it a daily ritual. It feels like a smaller 'bite' to take on and you always have the next day to try again or live differently.

For me the year has been one filled with many personal accomplishments. I have done a lot of inner work and been able to see inside of myself better than I have ever been able to in the past. I think the difference for me was that I was willing to 'look' inside and really 'see' myself without any judgements. This was key for me. When I finally really set out to 'learn' about Maggie that was when it all started to come together. I was able to shed certain thought processes and also retrain my brain to think and choose differently. I was able to look at my 'mistaken beliefs' and understand how they came to be and how they adversely affected my life. None of this work was easy. Some of it was relentlessly painful to look at and work through, but the rewards of letting them go was the goal that I saw in front of me and I was determined to get there. Part of that goal was to feel free from all that weighed me down and was essentially holding me back. Anyone who knows me might think that I look pretty all together and for the most part that is true, but we all have things inside that could use some work and the inner freedom that you get from doing this is the greatest reward ever. It doesn't mean that I don't have days that are challenging or days that I think maybe I should just go back to bed and start all over again, but on those days I now know better how I need to navigate through them best for myself.

For as many years as I can remember I have been saying to myself and those who have worked with me on gaining personal insight, that what I wanted most in life was 'peace and contentment'. And that sounds so simple doesn't it?? I think it is simple, but we so greatly complicate our lives in so many, many ways that the peace and contentment that we strive and look for is but a mirage in the distance. Something that we keep running towards but we never get there because of the roadblocks we construct. I wasn't putting things into place to allow that for myself and one of my mistaken beliefs supported that. I didn't really believe that I deserved a peaceful existence so I kept thwarting my efforts to achieve it. And I must remember that this was in my subconscious mind and tied to so much from my past. So much of this I didn't even realize and when I learned more and more about myself all the pieces of the puzzle started to come together. My life's self portrait no longer looks like a distorted Picasso painting but rather a beautiful landscape that I know has come about because of the careful tending and nurturing that I have afforded it.

So I can truly say that I look forward to this next year that lies ahead of me with great anticipation. For me it will be a year filled with 'days' where I can make choices that will continue to tend to the garden of my 'self' and provide the nurturing that I need. It's the only life I want to choose because I know that for me it's the best one.

May you transition into 2012 and be able to reflect on how you have grown in the last year. May the New Year hold for you all that you desire and bring blessings to your life. That is my wish for you.

Namaste to all................

great quote........

I heard this a few days ago and I really liked it........

"The challenge is not to be perfect, the challenge is to be whole"

~Jane Fonda

mercury glass.......

For a while now I have had a secret penchant for mercury glass. I`m not really sure what it is about it that I love, but there is something about it that resonates with me. It may be the aged look of the glass and silver together that I am drawn to or just even simply the sparkle of it. Maybe it is how the silver looks worn and it creates flecks that have been lost over time.The antique look of it really is so lovely and the light reflects off of it in such a gorgeous fashion. I just love how it looks! Today I was in the gift shop where I work and there was a basket of small ornaments that looked like mercury glass and I just needed to have a few and here they are.............

I just love them!

look how it sparkles.....



I will love the little ornaments that I purchased today, but I look very forward to finding my very first piece of mercury glass in the near future.....

cloves & oranges.......

Yesterday I was busy preparing for the Community Garden group to gather at my home for our year end meeting. By the afternoon I was ready to sit and relax for a bit so I decided to gathered some cloves and oranges and stud them. I think they turned out pretty well. Take a look............



Along with my dried orange slices I think they make a nice presentation. All this homemade'ness' is so much fun and so rewarding to me. I love it!

homemade love ............

"Homemade"......."handcrafted"...both words that I think are very special. And I have been doing just that lately. Making things for either myself or others and I believe that I both 'give' and 'recieve' alot of joy in doing so. If you follow my blog you will know that I do alot of canning in summer and fall, and the 'hands on' for that really is so rewarding for me. To share in my hard work during the winter is worth every minute of what I put into it during those harvest days in summer. I also recently made my grandson Brody a wonderful advent calender for the holidays and it turned out so great! Yesterday I tried my hand at drying orange slices and I think for the first attempt they didn't turn out too bad. I will be putting them on the christmas tree and I also used them on some gift bags.

beautiful slices.....

in the oven all aglow......

my first attempt...some maybe too dark but better next time :)

gorgeous!!

added to my gift bags of homemade bits and bites .......





I really love homemade because I believe that a little piece of your heart goes into it. How wonderful is that...........maybe we can call it 'heartmade' too .......

Have a great day!

for all to suffer less............

I read this morning that the Dalai Lama has a new book being released today. I always admire what he writes so it will undoubtedly be on my reading list. In a review that I read there was a phrase that jumped out at me and gave me cause to sit back and reflect on it. It read 'to bring peace to a suffering world'. Yes, this is a simple enough phrase but all that it says is so huge in the world that we live in and it occurred to me that it resonates on so many levels. Suffering is all around us and we seem to simply accept it. I believe that can be changed.

We are not at peace as individuals, communities, countries, societies, cultures and as a planet. We can see that all around us if we look closely. We are all suffering at some level and this has increased over the years to a height now that is almost too tall to reach to begin to make a change? I think it is on the brink of being just out of our reach, but that this has it's own purpose also. We often may not notice the depth of a problem until it reaches these huge proportions and only then are we are faced with the reality of what needs to happen. The whispers have run out and the volume has been turned up quite a bit.

We have a 'sadness' that reaches deep into our core and when that sadness faces outward it comes out in ways that spell our behavior. Mother Earth also has a sadness in her and only recently have we begun to realize that this has been by our own hand that she cries. The really devastating part of all of this is that we think we are fine and we think that all is fine around us. It's just easier to live this way because then no one has to take responsibility for any of it. We can all be in denial. This has become our normal way to live and experience life. I believe it can be different though.

 I have believed for a long time that a person can choose to live a life without suffering and that it will make a difference not only in their life, but in the lives of many. This is not necessarily easy though because it will give cause first of all for us to make changes that we need to make and we know how unsettling that can be. But when we can understand and look inside of our own suffering, then solutions are available to us and we can implement them to build a life that is less stressful. As we choose this for ourselves we begin to live a life that is blessed with greatness on many levels. If we set out to try to 'change the world' we will find the task ahead of us overwhelming and probably sign off on that challenge pretty quick. But instead if we simply look at our own life and make changes that will work for us, it will transcend to others as needed. It will be effortless for us in terms of not intentionally setting out to change the world, but the effects of our changed life will be witnessed by others and they will observe and then possibly absorb this for themselves. It will have a 'silent' impact on many and for others it may resonate largely. We just need to live our best life possible. I understand that not every day will be free from suffering, but how we deal with our daily challenges will be observed by others and the 'silent' teaching then has the possibility to cross into their life also.

One person's life can impact many lives. Let's choose to live our best life and in turn ease our own suffering and possibly the suffering of others also. These efforts will bring about changes in the world. I believe that.............

Namaste

from good to bad, to good again......

It's been an intensely emotional week where my spirits were dashed and I had to ask Spirit for to help bring them back into alignment. It's interesting to note that I had been feeling so well and then all of a sudden a couple of things happened and the tumble began. I was a bit surprised at just how deflated I felt and I was surprised at how quickly my feeling so well turned to an almost numb feeling. If I could have looked at myself from 'without' it would have been interesting for sure because there were two spheres of emotion working inside of me. I was aware of how I was feeling in relation to the events themselves and I was also aware of how intense these emotions were and wondering why that was. It was as if I moved outside of myself and could look to see how I was reacting to all of this. An unbiased observer of my own behaviors. That is a learning tool for me. I had a few days of full intensity with all of this and was able to brainstorm some of it with my partner's help. I feel blessed being able to do that. Our emotions impact each other and when events take place in either of our lives it requires understanding from that other person.

I am now several days 'away' from both events and it does allow me to view the elements of each in a better and more balanced way. Spirit is guiding me to these occurrences and will also guide me through them. This I believe.

Namaste

borrowed from the Dalai Lama.......

As human beings we all want to be happy and free from misery.

We have learned that the key to happiness is inner peace.

The greatest obstacles to inner peace are disturbing emotions such as

anger and attachment, fear and suspicion,

while love and compassion, a sense of universal responsibility

are the sources of peace and happiness.

words of Buddha.......

Live In Joy

Live in joy, In love,
Even among those who hate.

Live in joy, In health,
Even among the afflicted.

Live in joy, In peace,
Even among the troubled.

Look within. Be still.
Free from fear and attachment,
Know the sweet joy of living in the way.

                     ~

There is no fire like greed,
No crime like hatred
No sorrow like separation,
No sickness like hunger of the heart,
And no joy like the joy of freedom.

Health, contentment and trust
are your greatest possessions,
And freedom your greatest joy.

Look within. Be still.
Free from fear and attachment,
Know the sweet joy of living in the way.

from the Dhammapada, Words of the Buddha

year round joy......

It seems that in the month of December we hear the word 'joy' alot. The 'joy' of Christmas, 'joy' to the world, the 'joy' of the season, and it goes on and on. Now I don't necessarily think this is a bad thing but it gave me cause to wonder as to why we hear it so much in December and yet barely an honorable mention the rest of the year. Well, it may be mentioned here and there, but certainly not the way it is exalted in December. The last month of the year is practically filled with joy and the rest of the year seems to go without. Hmmm.....why is that?

I looked up the definition of joy and it's said to mean "the emotion of great delight or happiness caused by something exceptionally good or satisfying; keen pleasure; elation". Ok, that sounds good to me. Makes alot of sense and I can say that December is often filled with much of what the definition states. So what happens the rest of the year? Is there no 'delight' or 'happiness' in the first eleven months of the year? I realize we won't be walking around filled with joy each and every moment of our life, but I think it can be present alot more than what it is. I just don't think we need to be joy-'less' from January til November.  There must be 'joyful' things in our lives in the first 11 months. I like joy. I like delight and happiness. It makes me feel good and who doesn't want to feel good?

I look around as I move through life and see alot of people that do not express happiness. Maybe they don't know for themselves what that looks like or are unable to realize it in their life because they really don't have an understanding that happiness can be afforded for them also. The prevalent feeling in the world these days is not joy. We are much more surrounded by misery and unhappiness than joy. This has become our norm and then leads us to minimize even the possibility of happiness or joy. Our thinking and believing has been turned around and held at bay because of how the world has shifted itself to live in unhappiness. How did we get so unhappy? That's a whole other blog post but I think you know what I'm getting at. I think this is more than likely a big part of the problem. It's not uncommon for people to be puzzled by another person's happiness or good mood. I have had people come up to me and ask me how I am and when I say I'm 'great' they respond by questioning that. For a moment they make me think I maybe shouldn't feel so great and that I should re-examine that. It's not the norm anymore to be happy or feel joy. So then is unhappiness the 'new normal'? Oh dear.....we have really messed this up, but like I said if you look around, alot of everything points toward non-happiness. So how do we begin to change this attitude...... because it is an 'attitude' and it can be changed. Somewhere back we chose misery and unhappiness and now we can choose something different. I know it's not as easy as waking up and just being happy but if we even have the understanding that we have a choice then it makes a difference. We can be in charge instead of letting others be in charge for us. The more that we collectively begin to make a change then we will see changes reaching farther and farther from us. It's the ripple effect and it will simply do what it does so beautifully and it all starts with us.

There will always be something, even if it's only one little thing, to be joyful about in life. It need not be big. Yes, we may be living in a world prevalent with misery and unhappiness but let's choose to turn that around and fill our lives with joy. Start with even a few moments of joy and you will find that it will change how you feel. Then increase the moments of joy and you will find that it feels a whole lot better than miserable. Hopefully the scale of happiness vs. unhappiness will tilt itself to a new normal for yourself and you will feel the effects of joy. It does make a difference. It will change your whole being because what we do and how we feel affects us as a whole person. 

Let's look for and experience joy all year round. Let's find joy in our daily life and then bring it to others by simply being who we are and living the life that we do.......

May your day be joyful .........

Namaste

christmas parade 'after party' photos..............

This year was the first year for the Christmas parade 'after party'! I thought it would be a fun time to have everyone back to the house for some hot chocolate and cookies to warm up with after standing out in the cold watching the parade. And I also gave Brody his advent calendar this night so that he can start counting down the days to Christmas soon! This year the weather wasn't too cold but the wind was wild! We almost got blown away! All was well though and we had a fun time especially with Brody watching this year and being able to take it in a little bit more.

Our table was set with yummy cookies all ready for eating. My 'melt in your mouth' butter crescents looked like they had snow drifted on them :)

Hot chocolate was ready for all to enjoy too! Brody loved the marshmallows!

My pretty girl Brianne enjoying some hot chocolate!

Here's my little Brody enjoying his 'warm' chocolate and cookies too!

Megan, Wil and Brody enjoying family time together.

We all had a great time and I look forward to next years Christmas parade 'after party'! Another family tradition for all to enjoy! May your family or friend traditions rise up to meet you and bring you joy now and all year long!

Blessings............

children going hungry.....still in 2011

I watched a tv program yesterday and the host had two persons on who are involved in an organization that helps to feed children. It was called "Blessings In A Backpack". I know we have 'healthy breakfast' programs in many of our schools but this was a program that fills backpacks with food so that the children can take them home and help to feed their families on the weekend. They return the backpack on the Monday and the following Friday the backpack is filled again. I am not naive by any means but this program and the fact that we need something like this made me sad. Some of the children that were recieving these backpacks were on the show and they said that it made them feel good about themselves to be able to contribute to their family being able to eat. I could see their pride in this but I wish that children didn't need to concern themselves with where their dinner is coming from.

I realize that not unlike many nations we continue to have a 'hungry' population even in our own country of Canada. I'm not talking about Third World Nations here......this is right in our own backyard. I struggle to understand how this still happens and exists in 2011. We are a very powerful and strong nation and yet we cannot feed our own children and families. We seem to have placed our responsibilities in areas that don't include one of the basics of life. Maslow's heirarchy of needs includes food at the bottom of the pyramid as one of the 'most' basic of needs. If children especially are not recieving proper nutrition in the way of food then how is it possible for the next levels of Maslow's heirarchy to bode well in their lives. Nutrition is just too important for us to have children or adults going without food. There is just something about all of this that makes me very sad. I know that I will be making a contribution and that it will then allow for a child to take a backpack home and help to feed his or her family. Let's all do what we can to make a difference. Check out their website @ Blessings In a Backpack

Blessings to all............

made with love .....

My recent project was an advent calendar for my grandson Brody. All lovingly handmade one stitch at a time.............the results were wonderful! I loved how it turned out!

numbers and pockets all hand sewn and snowflakes too!

the rooftop.....

the best part ever :)

Traditions........

I've been working on a project for the last several weeks that has been very special to me. It was a hand crafted Christmas advent calender for my grandson Brody. It's not so much the project that is important, but rather what the project means to me and hopefully to him and even his family as he grows older and the tradition it will bring to each Christmas observed.

I need to start out by saying that I have a very small immediate family. It consists of only myself and my three children. Add to that my partner Jim and my daughter's fiance and we number 6 people. And don't get me wrong, I'm not longing for a big family or anything of that nature because I love my little family just the way it is. I'm not sure I could adequately express in words just how much they all mean to me. So as a way of expressing my love for them I truly enjoy our times together and try to make any occasion special. It is twofold in essence because I want to create these experiences for all of them to enjoy and remember and yet all the joy that it brings returns itself to me. A little selfish maybe but it's ok I think.

This leads me to tradition.....family traditions. 'Tradition' is described as 'a ritual, belief or object passed down within a society, still maintained in the present, with origins in the past'. The word 'tradition' is derived from the Latin tradere or traderer , literally meaning to hand over, to transmit or to give for safe-keeping. Traditions are most often carried forward from many generations past and are present in families today and move forward from there again. It's a bit different for my family in terms of the fact that I am the one creating these traditions for all of us and with that I feel somewhat a sense of responsibility as the matriarch of the family.......a good responsibility though. For me it is a wonderful gift that I can give to my family and have them take these traditions into their future lives.

We are social beings who all want to feel a sense of 'belonging' and 'connection' in a world where there is such a huge level of disconnect from others. With traditions we can come together as a group where there is a common element and it bonds us together even for a short period of time. Imagine for a minute that something gets in the way of a family tradition. It can create a sense of loss and disappointment and it could feel like something is missing. There is not a whole lot left in life that can be considered a constant. Traditions can be that way though. At least that's what I think. For myself I believe our traditions as a family keep us together and make us stronger.

My hope is that my calendar for Brody will bring with it a tradition that he and his family will look forward to each and every year. It is my gift to them.

My hope is that you have traditions in your life that you look forward to and can carry them in your heart with love and remember them for years to come.

Blessings to all...........

Happy for real............

When I look around me I see alot of unhappy people. It makes me think in terms of how 'happiness' seems to be what we are all looking for in some form, but is it eluding us or are we just not letting it into our lives? I think it might be the latter. I know for myself I seemed to make choices for many years that when it came to the big picture I was certainly not allowing it, happiness, to show itself to me. Oh, little moments of happiness maybe were there but the BIG happy was not for sure. I watch people move through life and wonder now if unconsciously we block happiness or maybe we are buying into a watered down version of it. Alot of what we do to find happiness is external. We look outside of ourselves and seek out things or maybe persons that will make us happy. Now don't get me wrong, I can readily admit that there are 'things' that make me happy and yet I'm well aware that this is not the long lasting and fulfilling happiness that fills my soul. But if a person isn't aware that this version of happiness is limited it can create a life of constant external happiness seeking. And if it's 'things' that you are after to make you happy it can break your budget and that never leads to happiness. You can fill your days with this seeking behavior and end up being years into it and still be no further ahead. Aaahhhh.......elusive happiness. Is it designed that way so that you never really get there? Does the external attempt keep you wanting for more and therein lies the message. The whisper that is telling you that you're not understanding the true path to happiness? How long does your 'happiness' last? Do you go to bed happy and wake up still feeling it? I believe at least for myself and possibly many others that this is a choice. I can choose to be miserable or I can choose to be happy. People might argue that circumstances block or get in the way of our happiness and this in fact can be true to a point, but there is always a way of changing how you look at things and realizing that it can be different and therefore be better understood. Maybe it's easier to be miserable? I don't even like to think that but it may in fact be true for many. It's what they know and anything else would feel uncomfortable. So maybe then being happy in small doses is an approach to altering that? Small steps towards change. Changing our perspectives and then changing how we feel. Of course we are not going to be happy all the time, but we can decide how long we want to have it exist to the left or the right of us. I like mine in the center of myself and when it is shifted because of circumstance it's never far away and can quickly be returned to its heart home. I decided that I could be in charge of my happiness personally and from within and when I made that shift my happiness quotient increased dramatically and it lasted alot longer. I make the choice every day. I favor it as the best option for me. I know it's the healthier choice in all facets for myself also. It increases my emotional, physical and spiritual well-being and any choice that does all of that is well worth my efforts.

Sometimes we need to 'weed' through our life and decide what is going to go and what is going to stay. Let the energy draining things go and bring in more of the positives that will bring happiness along with it as a bonus. Being happy isn't a 'thing'. It's a side effect of how we live our lives and the choices we make. I like my happy life much better than the one of the past.

Have a 'happy' day!

Breaking my cycle......

Slow down, let go, ease up, sit back, breathe, relax..........all of these things remind me of what I need to do to make my life one that when I awaken in the morning I will look forward to my day with positivity. I have had all those years of stress and strife and have ultimately come to the point where I can see that much of that came from choices I made and the results spoke for themselves. It's taken me a long time but it has been my personal journey so it unfolded as it was supposed to and many lessons were learned along the way and some lessons I have just realized recently. I believe that each day has a lesson wrapped inside of it if we just take the time to look hard enough to find it. For years it was as if my eyes had a veil over them and I could only see so much and that only allowed me to live a limited life. But then maybe I was only able to handle just that at the time. I know there are things that I can only understand now and I believe that is much due to the fact that I 'get it' because I am looking at it with more maturity than when I was 20, 30 or possibly even 40 and have a multitude of life experiences to draw on. And the irony when I look back is that I thought that I "got it" at all of those ages and was moving through life pretty well. I really never knew there was a better way until I felt such unrest in my life and wasn't going to accept any more of it. I knew that there could be something better and it started a few years ago when I just wanted (and needed) life to be simple. I had managed to complicate it to the point that my health was now not only suffering but on the threshold of chronic illness. If I had continued with the lifestyle that I had chosen the door would open itself and I would have walked into my future of ill health. That was my wake-up call. It was time to step back and take a long, hard look at what I wanted my life to look like. But hadn't I already and for many years known what I wanted my life to look like? I had been saying it to myself for years inside of my head. I just wanted a "peaceful and quiet" life. Nothing big. Just a 'little' life. It was like a mantra in my head all the time. But I wasn't living it or choosing it and now I had been pushed to the edge and it was time to again make a choice.  I was addicted to my own stress and all that went along with it. It was as if  'busyness' was my middle name. How much could I heap on my plate and still perform? When my plate was full I just kept getting a bigger plate. That's easy enough! Little did I know that this was going to catch up to me. But I kept moving forward in this way and I knew nothing else. If felt as though I was at my best living like this and it was my familiarity. I was doing everything within my power to sabotage the existence of my peaceful and quiet life. I was living the exact opposite of what I was repeating in my head. People tried to tell me that I was doing too much and that I needed to slow down but inside I secretly felt proud. My ego was saying that I was going to be different than everyone else and would be able to handle it. I was going to show them all that I could sustain this crazy pace and be just fine. After all we live in a society that applauds extreme productivity and performance. So I figured that the more I could juggle the better I would be and I would be seen as extremely productive and then measure up to something that society decided was acceptable. I have come to understand now that we are actually damaging ourselves with these choices. I know this firsthand......I suffered inside of what I thought was a good thing. I was living a lie. A lie that I had in my head that did stem from my upbringing where only productivity was applauded and I was also told that I would not amount to anything valuable in life. And being a child I could only agree to what I was being presented with because they were in charge and I looked up to them. I carried this into my adult life even when they were no longer in charge of my thoughts and choices. As an adult I interpreted value as 'doing' as much as I could in life at one time and I would be rewarded with acclaim. My lesson to understand this differently has been a long time in coming but I am so thankful that now I truly 'get it'. It took ill health and near chronicity to have me finally understand all of this. I didn't listen to the whispers and then the yelling started. It turned into screaming coming from my body and then I finally listened. I really 'get it' now. Having this understanding has not necessarily meant that I awoke one day and it was all easier and simple. No, it has been a very difficult shift for me. My mind and body were addicted to the pace that is was used to. It had a set point that was very high. Slowly that set point is coming down and it is getting easier though. I am able to catch myself more quickly now when I feel myself sliding back into those bad habits. It is a daily task for me to remember to live life more in an 'easy' way. Life is no longer the emergency that I was letting it be. I now know how 'peace and quiet' feels and I will admit that sometimes it still feels uncomfortable because I was addicted to a hectic lifestyle for so many years. I sometimes have to give myself permission to relax and live easily. I'm getting there though. Living my life the way I had been in the past was very hard work and it felt heavy. Now that weight is gone. I'm so grateful that I learned this lesson when I did. I still have many years ahead of me to enjoy the quiet and peaceful life that I now choose......

Namaste

Spiritual fine tuning.....

Spirit has given me 2 weeks to do some fine tuning. I have been home sick for 2 weeks and this time has been one of spiritual and physical health reflection. I've run a gammut of emotions with this illness from being frustrated with it to being grateful for it. That's my spiritual side clashing with my human side. That is a lesson in and of itself. Learning to balance those two aspects of our personalities. It's easier somedays more so than others. The biggest lesson is that when I am given these times to reflect I really need to follow through with that which I resolve to change or alter. So many times once we feel improved we easily let go of or forget all the reflecting we did and carry on just the same as always. The only thing with that is that we may find ourselves ill again in the future and reflecting again on all the same things. Why do the work twice? I need to get it right.....or at least partly right :) the first time. After that I can work on new things when given the chance and maybe Spirit won't 'put me down' by getting sick and forcing myself to have that time alone. So I continue to learn and am grateful and thankful for that. Lessons learned from inside of an illness.

Autumn Fruit Jam.....

I wanted to make a jam but summer was busy and it is now late in the canning season. I then found this recipe that took fall fruits and mixed them to make a delicous sounding toast or english muffin treat! It is a combination of plums, apples and pears with a hint of cinnamon and ginger. So this was my morning project and I think it turned out pretty good. I will need some tasters from the family I guess to be sure!

Autumn Fruit Jam

living large..........

What is it that we really see around us or inside of us? Is what we see the truth or do we simply make it look like our truth and then accept it as that? We are really good at pretending to believe something when in fact we know that it is not the 'real deal', but in an effort to protect ourselves we go for it. It's our easiest choice. This behaviour is how we course through our days and it allows us to stay safe in the falsity of the situation or the belief. It's easier to pretend our way through life than get real with our life.
 I have done this in the past and probably still participate in it now until I quickly realize what I am doing. When you have the awareness of the 'reality' of the situation, your conscience then much more easily and quickly picks up on it and then you can have that inner dialogue with yourself as to whether you choose what's right or what's wrong. We have become so brilliant at letting ourselves believe something when in fact its either not true or is only a mere representation on what is true. We play along. But it serves us in so many ways. Is it easier to believe a falsity than the truth? It must be because we do it all the time. So why is 'real' life so hard to accept? What makes it difficult? Maybe in part because we let others determine what is 'right' or 'wrong' in our lives or societal lives? We have moved our beliefs towards letting others be in charge and then we give ourself permission to be a victim to that. Really? A victim? Maybe a victim of ourselves because can you really blame it on someone else ?We like to feel safe and all of this lets us stay safe. To venture out of our safe world and get real is often a deal breaker for many. It's like 'rocking' our own boat. Who wants that. Well, it's most often the only time that things will make a difference in our lives. Stepping outside of our safety zone is scary and since we have lived inside of this for so, so long its very foreign to us. So we stay safe and our growth is squelched. We accept unconsciously that we have to live this way, but yet at some point we turn inward and wonder why our lives are unfulfilled. Sometimes we just simply settle for less than we need to and believe that this is OK and that this is what our life is destined to be. How sad this is. Of course we don't need to live 'large' lives in terms of possession, but we need to live large in terms of authenticity. I think that until we look around us and ask ourselves if we are really in charge of the life we are living then we aren't really sharing who the 'true' us is. Once you decide to be 'real' and let the rest of the 'unreal' fall away you will feel a sense of relief come over you. The pressure of always being 'on' is lifted and we can live that authentic life we deserve. Listen closely to your inner voice to see if all is well with you. Everyone arrives at a different time. And that's simply OK......I just want to meet you there......

Namaste............

quote......

Your work is to discover your work and then with all your heart to give yourself to it.

~The Buddha~

a new week.....

I have been on holidays for 3 weeks and it has been wonderful. We spent 2 weeks on an amazing vacation in Italy and we truly created the time of our lives. It was 'a little bit of heaven'. We returned with yet another week off which was well needed for myself in terms of the jet lag and time changes. It seemed that I needed at least that much time to get back on track.

Yesterday we had our Thanksgiving dinner with my children and as always it was a treasured time. My family is not many in numbers but the love we share is on a large scale. For me it is always a special time when we are together so it was a nice way to end the holidays.

So today I'm back to my work at the hospital and I remain to be on abbreviated hours and we will see how that goes. I had a difficult situation at work a while back and I am still working through that at my workplace. It will be fine. The vacation away was a great healer in that regard.

Fall is in the air and yet the temperatures have been marvelous. Our days right now remain warm and balmy. I am good with that and yet the crisp fall air that is very likely on its way will be welcomed also. It will beckon soups and stews and warm, cosy blankets to wrap up in in front of the fireplace. For me that conjures up a smile and contentment. Throw in a good book and I'm all set.

This week I'm excited to be going to see my dear friend Mae Moore perform a benefit concert in London. It will be great to see her again. And, I will be spending the evening with a great friend Cathy so it's wonderful all around.

Yesterday we got tickets to go and see a new play at the Grand Theatre about Julia Childs titled "Mastering The Art". I love everything about her so I was thrilled to see that this play was going to be performed at the Grand. I'm excited!! Cooking is something that I'm expanding lately and she of course is the best! I can't wait to go and see it. It will be awesome!

Our newest family member Cooper is adjusting well to our home and Abby is doing her best to welcome him in the house. It's fun to have 2 furkids in the house! Well....at least that's what I'm saying today.

Happy Monday to all.............have a great week!

the giving of thanks......

It is early morning on a Sunday and it is the day that we set aside to acknowledge the gratitude and thanks that we observe in our lives. This is the day that we 'publicly' allow ourselves to feel thankful. For me it is a day that we get together as a family and give our thanks, but I make sure that each and every day of my life I do the same. Someone might think that that is a bit over the top and do we really remember to give thanks each day? Well, for me it is important that I do that. I cannot take for granted all that I have been allowed or given in my life. Each day does present itself with many things that I am grateful for and the challenge sometimes is being thankful for those things that are not always a positive or good thing. Even the struggles that we have are something that I can be grateful for. That took me a long time to understand, but I'm finally getting to the point where I am accepting of that. I find my lessons in life are mostly presented to me as a challenge and the gratitude comes along when I can see the gift in it. So yes, I am grateful each and every day.

Today is a day that we share our thanks 'together'. It's a day where we can come together with friends and or family and celebrate all that we have in our life. Today is also a day of 'giving'....where we can give of ourselves and be grateful to have the opportunity. Give of yourself and expect nothing in return.  Give of yourself because it is the right thing to do.Give because you can....simply give. It will make you feel good and raise your spirits. It helps a person to feel well....and that is also something to be thankful for.

Every day take just a moment of it and be thankful. Even if its just for the simplest of things. Even if its just for having that 'moment' in time. Gratitude doesn't only apply to the 'big' things. It's about everything.......find your gratitude and acknowledge it every day. Don't let it slip to the back of your mind. Keep it right there out in front and let it do the work it knows best. It will raise your awareness and bring peace to your whole being.

Happy Thanksgiving to those of you who are here with me today.......thank you for sharing these words together. Blessings to all.

a saturday in october.........

Wow.....a busy summer has led to a busy fall so far. We just got back from a trip to Italy and now back to real life with a newness. It is farmers market morning here in town and since I haven't been for a couple of weeks it will be fun and interesting to see what is on the farmers tables. I hope to pick up some flowers for my kitchen and maybe some 'scented gratitude leaves' from Melinda at the Holey Stone Faerie Co. I also need some soap from Nicole at Spatopia and she has a new product this week that I think will make a great stocking stuffer for my girls (yes, Christmas is on my mind!). And I might consider a basket of peaches to make into some jam. Otherwise, its Thanksgiving weekend here in Canada so I do have to pick my turkey from our friends Cathy and Gary(organic of course) and get all the fixin's ready for our family dinner. The pumpkin cookies made with agave are already to go and the ice cream is in the freezer. All of what needs to be done for our dinner will be carried out with love and that will be felt at the dinner table. I always look forward to having all the children over and having family time. It is important to me and it helps us all stay close and be that family unit that is so often lost in society these days. It is a small part of the bigger part....the micro and the macro......that will promote connection in a world of disconnect. OK......this feels like its turning into something bigger than I meant so I will get back to the topic at hand.

Yummy!

A holiday weekend, my last weekend off before returning to work after 3 weeks (it's been wonderful!) and family time. It's also our first weekend with our newest family member Cooper! He is a stray cat that has been visiting us all summer and as the weather is starting to turn cold we decided that he needed a permanent home and we opened our doors to him. His transition is going well in terms of our other cat Abby so that is great. We have been grooming Abby about Coopers arrival for weeks now and I think it helped ! I will share a pic of our Cooper......

What's not to love :)

Tomato mania.......

I have spent much of this week making homemade tomato sauce made from organic tomatoes from my friend Cathy who along with her husband have an organic farm. I was able to get a bushel of the gorgeous tomatoes a couple of days ago and went on a spree of canning. Making a seasoned tomato sauce and then also a recipe for a tomato and basil sauce that everyone here loves. So I need to make enough for everyone to be able to share in. I love the whole process and certainly love having the use of these in winter, but I must admit it is alot of work. I have been working at my job and trying to fit all this in to a busy schedule and we are also getting ready to go on a holiday abroad. My kitchen has been a like a processing center all week it seems. Canning supplies and tomatoes everywhere. It is all quite frenetic this week but I do love seeing those jars all sealed and ready for the pantry. It's so satisfying to me. I feel quite proud of it all........

Here's a pic of my finished product for today..........

..........there's more canning set to go for tomorrow....so g'nite all

the color green ........

I was out to the farm of my friend Cathy the other day. I was there to pick up my bushel of organic tomatoes so that I could make some sauces for winter. She also gave me this beautiful tomato that was the most amazing color green with stripes on the outside. It was absolutely gorgeous!....if a tomato can be gorgeous, and I think it can be......I'm sure the tomato already knows that ;)

Check out the color!

 I made myself a tasty sandwich with that tomato and it was delicious to be sure! It was my first green tomato experience and it was lovely......here....have a virtual bite!

back for a minute or two

My goodness, where has the summer gone.......It's has been a while since I have done any writing. Summer has been a busy one with lots going on and its going to stay that way for the next few days too. Right up to the time that we leave for our holidays it will be busy with preserving and canning our bountiful harvest from the garden and the garden of others (from the local Farmers' Market). I might have timed the holiday wrong in terms of what I am trying to get done, but it will be SO worth it come winter time and I can just go to the root cellar and grab a jar of 'something' and make a meal.

from this..........

apple butter....

I will get back on track with my blog and let everyone know what has been going on in my life over the past few months..........until then here's a pic of all that I have been up to lately.

quotation...........

"What is the use of a house if you don't have a decent planet to put it on?"

   Henry David Thoreau

for the love of antiques......

On the weekend Jim and I took a Sunday drive to the Aberfoyle outdoor antique market. We had only been there once before but we knew it was a place that we would love to go again given our love for all things antique. Off we went on one of the hottest days of the year and we packed a picnic lunch to enjoy together. We were not disappointed with all that we saw and our eyes beheld a feast of all things old. These tiny shoes spoke to me in terms of who they may have been worn by and what their life story may have held. I couldn't resist taking this photo......

what small child wore these shoes?

It was so very, very hot out and we were looking for shade to stand in at every opportunity. Taking cold water breaks just to keep us from vanquishing in the heat. But on we forged determined to see all that we came to see. And we were not let down. Of course I saw so much that I loved, but I remained frugal in my purchases and only bought one item. That's pretty good for me!

lunch time :)

We made sure we wandered well and didn't miss any of the displays. There is just so much to see. We took time for our little picnic lunch and that was delightful! It gave us a chance to nourish ourselves and also cool off under the covered picnic area. I LOVE picnics! 

may I have a spoon please sir?

We managed to check out all the areas and even in the heat we were there for 4 hours! I think we would maybe love to go again on a cooler day maybe in the fall. There just might be a little something that might want to live out a part of its life story with me at our house.

jars for filling......

Our day was wonderful in many ways. A great time spent together, time amid so many lovely old things, a great picnic to enjoy and a summer memory on one of the hottest days of the year.

I look forward to our next visit........

my city garden........

I'm not a gardener. I know little about it. As a child I grew up with a garden and really took no interest in it. It was just something that my parents did. When I married I moved to the city and never wanted to go back to the country.....ever. Things change though.....and I've changed. Now, I would love to move back to the country, but until that happens I am a city living  'gardener' with a small vegetable patch. I guess I'm coming of age. I have to smile when I write that only because I'm not really sure what that means. I don't consider myself old, but sometimes my ability to embrace a good thing takes a while. Although I have to go easy on myself because I have not had a yard in the city that was able to have a vegetable garden and that was a choice I made. My yard is a perfect picture of beautiful and graceful landscaping and that in itself is very important to me. It is my 'zen' space that feeds my soul. But aahh...... a 'food' garden is a different thing. I have had a passion about good food and cooking for a long, long time and understand the need for us to take care of ourselves in terms of good nutrition. My body knows when it is given good food and performs better with it. My body can 'feel' good food not unlike it can 'feel' bad food. With my involvement in the Community Garden project I am now able to have a small plot of land and grow some of my own food. It is turning out to be more than I ever expected. I am smitten with every bit of it. The small amounts of food that I have already brought home to my table have delighted not only my palette, but also my soul. I tasted our romaine lettuce and it was nothing like the 'store' variety. Last week I brought home the first kohlrabi and to me it was like biting into butter, it was so very tender. I made tasty, tasty pesto last weekend and the color of it was the most divine thing I have seen lately. There is so much to taste and see and smell and experience!! I am truly enjoying the garden more than I would have ever thought. I knew it would be a beneficial experience, but it has turned out to be so much more. 

from garden to table..........



homemade is good...........



You bet!!...........salad caesar style straight from the garden! Oh...how delicious it was!!

again my garden............



the 'heart' of my garden.....

I know that I have written about my garden before, but it always bears another sharing here as the summer moves on. I sat out into the evening the other night and as the sky changed from day to night the light of the moon began to cascade over the garden and weave itself in between the clouds. I gazed at my trees and the leaves were at rest not unlike myself. The garden was quiet and it was so soothing to the soul. For me there is nothing like that feeling as I sit outside on a warm summer night and listen to the quiet. 'Listening to the quiet' will only make sense to those that have experienced that. If you have, you will know exactly what I mean. It's just so perfect after a day of being busy doing things that need doing and living life. All those things that need to be tended to and then taking the time to sit quietly whether it be alone or with someone else. It's a great way to let yourself become whole again. To let our bodies come to a stop and rest for a while......like a recharging of ourselves. It's why we sleep at night also....so that our body can rest and restore itself for a new day. Taking time to sit in the garden at night adds to that for me. It takes me to that place of quiet so that I can begin the restoration work even before I fall asleep. Our world and the lives we lead are too busy and full of activities that steal valuable energy from us and we must replace and renew it every day. This quiet time in the garden is one of the ways I can do that........I look forward to my next quiet time in the garden. Namaste...........

natural insect repellant recipe

I'm going to give this a try......the kids are going camping next week and will probably need some...

HERBAL INSECT REPELLANT

1/2 teaspoon citronella essential oil
1/2 teaspoon eucalyptus essential oil
1/2 teaspoon lavender essential oil
4 ounces distilled witch hazel

Mix ingredients in a 4-ounce spray bottle. Shake well. Spray onto exposed skin, avoiding eyes and mucous membranes. Reapply every 2 hours, or as needed.

my first time pesto.....yum!

garlic scapes

I have only just this year been introduced to garlic scapes. I had never heard of them, let alone ever seen them before. I am pretty well versed in culinary terms, but this one had escaped me..excuse the play on words:). My first time using them I simply sauted them with asparagus, but I came across a pesto recipe that I really wanted to try! It is from one of my favorite websites, in fact the same one that I found the strawberry galette on. The recipe was simple.....garlic scapes, basil, parmesan, hazelnuts and olive oil with then salt to taste. I was making lunch for Bri and her friend and decided this might be a great thing to serve along with some homemade sausage and grilled ciabatta bread. So I went ahead and chopped the scapes, tore the basil and grated the parm.....add to that the olive oil and toasted hazelnuts and it was terrific!! I can't wait to try it with maybe walnuts or even the standard pine nuts. So another great new endeavor in my recipe collection! Oh how I do love to cook........and entertain with good food!

Life is a banquet and today mine served up garlic scape pesto!





how beautiful is that!!

Buon appetito!!



the '60' lesson.............

I sat quietly several days ago and my mind was simply wandering in many directions and to many places. It then came to stop at a place that for some reason was all about aging. I found myself reflecting on the fact that I was in several years going to be 60 years old. Heaven knows I'm well aware of my age, but this thought process on that particular day felt different. Sixty that day sounded old....simple as that. I felt myself somewhat shiver with the realization that this was going to happen and it wasn't going to be good. How can I stop this? What do I do about this? Are there any choices?? Yikes....I needed to get a handle on this quick or else I felt that there was no point in wanting to even be one day older. Don't get me wrong I wasn't going to get depressed about this, but it also wasn't making me smile with joy. I was secretly hoping that there was maybe another road I could take to avoid this whole thing. Don't we come to the proverbial 'fork' in the road lots of times in our life. Well this time I think I should maybe take the other road. Hmmmm......

So I had to really take a good look at where I'm at in my 55 years here on this planet. Life for me has not been easy, but I obviously chose alot of what happened and the rest came to me for other reasons. I could decide to veer from my current life path but my life right now is good. I have been working on myself for many years and can say that I like who I have become. Others might differ in opinion and that's ok too :). I smile and laugh more than I frown or cry, so I think thats a pretty good thing. What became clear to me is that I need to look at each day carefully and create a day for myself that I can look back on and smile about or at least know that I did my best. I know that some days will be tougher than others, but they can still be dealt with in a way that will be satisfying in the end. I know this isn't rocket science, but I don't think we focus on this much. I think we walk, run or stumble through life without thinking about it too much. Only when something happens do we stop and wonder what's going on as if we are not even connected to it. I need to take ownership for each day and write my own history as beautifully as I can. So here I go on another step in my journey making sure that I take each day and live it well. It kinda sounds like 'living in the moment' doesn't it? Yes, well that's part of it. I guess for me it was just driven home in a big way when the number 60 showed up in my mind. So, that thought process has now become a gift and I am grateful. I won't say 'no thanks, you shouldn't have', because in fact yes it needed to be given to me and I did need to accept it or it would have shown up somehow or somewhere else in my life. Learning the lesson was the easy part. Now I have to apply what I already know and live it........and I think I can do that. I am the author of my own life story.....and each day is a page in my book of life.

Namaste......

"The mind that is wise mourns less for what age takes away; than what it leaves behind"

~

William Wordsworth

my daisies.......

I love my daisies as they show themselves off over the river rocks....

community gardening........

our lovely tomatoes

romaine ready for the salad bowl

teeny tiny peppers coming along :)

I had to watch Brody for a bit this morning and since they don't live far from the Community
Garden site I thought we could walk over and see how all of our plants were growing. Brody loves going for a walk so off we went. The garden plots are all coming along great and harvesting of some vegetables is ready to go. I picked some more swiss chard, basil, arugula and onions and will use these for our dinner tonight. I love the whole thing about 'from garden to table' and can now appreciate so much more what my parents had a garden for. This little garden plot has done so much for me in terms of my own growth. So......as the garden grows, I grow also. It is creating connection for me. Connection to the earth, the plants, to community with others, my daughter who I share my plot with and also a further connection to my grandson who often comes with me when I go there. I believed for a long time that the community gardens would be such a huge benefit in so many ways for so many people and that was where my passion was focused. I was focused on how others would benefit. I love giving people an opportunity to learn and this was a perfect project for just that. I believe it is certainly providing all of those things to all the gardeners and yet its impact for me is the bonus in all of this. I have learned so much already in the short time that we have been gardening together. I look forward to all that is yet to come.

As I said before........as my garden grows, I grow also.......and this is a good thing.

quotation........

Every human being is the author of his own health or disease ~ Buddha

something she said...........

Home is a refuge not only from the world,

but a refuge from my worries,

my terrible concerns.

I like beautiful things around me.

I like it to be beautiful because it delights my eyes and my soul is lifted up.

Maya Angelou, December 17, 2010

strawberry galette.....so yummy!

all set to go in the oven .....

I came across this quick and easy recipe on a favorite website. Since our local strawberries are almost finished I thought I would pick up a last quart and make this galette. The instructions were no fuss and before I knew it I had my strawberries all wrapped up and ready to go into the oven. It was a hit for sure and I know I will be making this again as the summer progresses and the fruit season moves along. I love it when a good recipe comes along!