love this Arabian proverb.......

"A friend is one to whom one may pour out all the contents of one's heart, chaff and grain together, knowing that the gentlest of hands will take and sift it, keep what is worth keeping, and with the breath of kindness, blow the rest away"

sugar is my poison......

I have been on a journey of health consciousness for many years. My choice of profession also lends itself to this subject since I am a nurse. I see the effects of ill health each day that I go to work and have chosen to walk a path that will allow me to have a healthy life as best as I am able. Not unlike many, I went through my own years of maybe some not so optimal choices in terms of health and nutrition and also have experienced high levels of stress which is a predominant factor in our health status. (That's a whole other blog post) I have come to recognize for myself what choices I need to make in order to live my best life and feel the best I can. One of the issues I was dealing with on a very large level several years ago was my unending levels of fatigue. I had never felt so tired in all my life. It was the kind of tired that wasn't going to be better after a night's sleep or even after several night's sleep.I would wake up that way and carry it with my throughout my day and then take it to bed with me to awaken the next day not feeling any better at all.  I was feeling like I was never going to be rested again and I was moving through life feeling very depressed about this since I still had to carry on somehow. I lived with this for many, many months and only when I linked a couple of experiences together did I recognize what was maybe the problem.

 

I was at work and there was a staff appreciation celebration where they were offering free ice cream. Well, who turns down ice cream! I went along with my co-workers and had a half portion of what they were offering (since I do try to be portion aware). It was delicious and within 30 minutes I was ready to sleep. And I mean I was ready to curl up in a little ball anywhere possible and sleep the rest of my shift away. The tiredness I felt was almost unexplainable.It is a tiredness that is unbearable. A couple of days later I was having lunch with my daughter at home and for dessert we decided to share in a butter tart. She had a half and I had the same. Once again, within 30 minutes I was over-the-top tired! Now, I had felt these kind of tiredness episodes before since I had been feeling this fatigue for so long, but it was on this day in particular that I put it all together and had an 'aha' moment. I connected both of these situations in terms of the sugar content in the ice cream and the butter tart. I decided then that I needed to know more about the effects of sugar in a persons diet. I know a lot about diabetes since I deal with that in my job on a daily basis, but I felt that this was somewhat different. I decided to eliminate sugar as best I could from my diet and wait to see what happens. I read and researched all that I could in terms of the effects of sugar on the body. I could tell from my resarch that sugar had to go. So all sweets were now off limits, which isn't too hard for me since my sweet tooth is not dominant for me, but there were times when a cookie might have been tasty. Remarkably I found this to be easier than I thought it would be. Partly because as I mentioned I don't crave alot of sweets and the other was the fact that I knew how I would feel if I did eat anything with sugar in it. That was enough to keep me away from it. The feeling of fatigue day in and day out was excruciating. Putting one foot in front of the other with large levels of effort because I always felt so tired was wearing me down. I needed to find the answer and this was maybe it. I have been reading food labels for years, but now was looking at where the sugar content came into play on the label. Where was it in the hierarchy of ingredients? The higher up on the radar it was, the further away it was in my diet. Fructose, glucose, sucrose, lactose, HFCS are just a few of the ingredients that I look for. I also had to look at foods that have starches that are then converted to sugar in the body. No more soda biscuits for me. The change that the elimination of sugar from my diet came to have was huge. I believe that I have a sugar sensitivity. It affects me personally in the way of fatigue and if I eat something with sugar in it now not only will I feel fatigued but I will feel crummy for maybe a couple of days. None of that is worth it. I do eat small amounts of fruit, but have stayed away from fruit juices. I have learned what to do in terms of my sensitivity and I feel very fortunate to have found my answer to all of this. I do have times where this is reinforced for me and yesterday was one of those times. I treat myself to a chai latte every now and then and did so before an appointment I had. I took my book to the local cafe and there I sat and sipped my treat. By the afternoon I felt tired and mentally flat. I had noted it's sweetness immediately but since it was my treat and I had had a latte here before I thought it was all good. To my dismay it was not. I'm not sure if they have changed something or my sensitivity was especially in high drive. I do know this.....I can't have their chai latte anymore and I looked online for a recipe that included agave. I will try it soon.

 

This discovery was a part of my journey of self-care. What do I need to do to feel and look my best? That involves many things and some that I continue to work on each and every day. Some I have a bettter handle on than others and some at times will fall into the background, while others will take center stage. It all balances out for me. All in all I know that looking after me is something that I neglected for a long time and put others first for many years. As a mother that was almost predictable, but now as a woman who essentially has only herself to look after I have no excuses to not feel and look my best. If it doesn't happen I am the only one I can point my own finger at and then move forward with what I know I need to do.

 

So, sugar is not my friend. We had to part company almost two years ago. I only miss the sweetness in rare moments.......otherwise, I enjoy the feeling of wellness much, much more.

 

Have a healthy day.

 

Blessings..............

the passing......

Tonight I was honored to sit at the bedside of a woman who's time was about to be complete here on earth. I had 20 minutes to go before my shift was over and I went to look in on her one last time. Her condition had been poor all day and I knew that her time to pass on was near. As I looked in on her for the last time I could see that her time was now very close. She had had visitors during the day who had sat quietly at her bedside, but right now there was no one with her. I could see that she only had a very short time left and felt that she should not be alone during her last moments. I held her hand and stroked her forehead in an effort to comfort her and allow her to feel my presence. In her eyes I could see a lifetime of experiences and memories. I silently wondered about her life and the woman she had been. Her breaths became slower and less frequent and finally they simply came to an end. Her hands were now cool to the touch and I could see the peace in her eyes. Her life here on this earth had come to a close and now she was taking on a new life in the hereafter. I hope that she is soaring like an angel now..........

I am very grateful for this special time that was afforded me at the bedside of this dying woman. We are not generally fond of death, but this experience was a gift. I was able to be with this beautiful human being whilst she took her last breaths here on earth and I was truly honored.

Namaste..............

the beach in february.....

the lighthouse on the pier

It is the second day of February and it seemed like an OK thing to go for a walk on the beach. The weather has been particularly mild for this area and I knew the beach would be clear of any snow making it therefore an easy walk along the shore. I drove the familiar road along the lake and within 20 minutes was approaching the waters edge. It's a little place called Port Bruce on the north shore of Lake Erie. You can go there on an early summer morning and often be the only one there or if you are a bit later you will see all the fishermen lined up on the pier waiting for the fish to bite. All in all its a nice beach with a peacefulness that I enjoy.  There are many stones that make their home on this beach and many have found their way home to our home and today was no exception. My partner also frequents this beach and he and myself have often found Shamanic holey stones here. I thought maybe I would find some today but instead I was gifted with four stones of color. One was a beach glass of beautiful green and the others were gold, white and pink. All colors of healing and I will use these in my healing work. I felt blessed to be given these wonderful gifts and thanked Spirit for them. I walked a distance along the shoreline and then began my return to the car. It was a bit brisk but it was so lovely to hear the sound of the water along the shore and also the birds that were about. I shared a message with the beach and left it to be shared with whomever came along after me.

I will remember this February walk on the beach at Port Bruce. It's not often that a person can do that here at this time of year. Blessings abound. I will leave you with my message ........

my offering

today.....

For some reason today this feels like a journal post.

My energy today began fine and then progressed into a very heavy, heavy feeling. I have had a bit on my mind today in regards to my partner's health issues but I really didn't feel as though this was the problem. I wasn't sure what was causing how I was feeling, but I felt so weighed down and so tired. After a couple of hours of feeling like this I wondered if I had an attachment and decided to work on that. I have had lost souls attach themselves to me in the past and I have been able to recognize this and then work with them to move them to a temporary place. I then work with them to have them finally cross over. It was almost immediate......the feeling of heaviness lifted and I felt so much better. Unless people are tuned into these types of things they may never realize just exactly what might be going on with them and possibly think that there is something wrong with themselves. My intuitive senses today brought to the forefront that 'something' was just not right and that is usually a clue for me that I have an attachment. I know when 'I just don't feel like myself' that something is amiss. Tonight I will assist the lost soul in crossing over and have them come to the peace they need to have.

Blessings to all...........

time again............

I'm not sure why I haven't written here in a while because there has been lots going on and yet setting the time aside to write hasn't happened. There has been alot of spiritual shifting going on for me and it is all so perfect. I can sense that more and more I am coming to a greater place of solace within myself and it feels so great. The calm and serenity that it makes me feel is something that I welcome and as much as I could wish that it had occurred sooner I have to believe that now it exactly the right time. My meditation practice is a big part of what is happening right now with me and it is providing much welcomed calm and relaxation. I am somewhat surprised with this even though I have read over and over again that exactly this would happen. My meditation practice in the past was minimal but now I see that it is an integral part of my day. I awaken in the morning and look forward to having that time alone with myself. When the morning brings with it a reason that does not allow me to begin my day that way it feels now as though something is missing. So having always heard that it is a very beneficial practice is true. Imagine that.....something having an outcome exactly as predicted. Why do we doubt these things? I guess because the human part of us springs forward and decides for us. Thank goodness I can over ride that with my 'wise self' and see otherwise. So all is good and I know that it all needed to come together right now and I am blessed in that.

I have been thinking of things to blog about and must begin a practice of writing down those ideas. I will start that tomorrow. Until then, be well .....

I love this......

This quote is from A Course In Miracles and I love all that is says and what it stands for.

“Every decision I make is a choice between a grievance and a miracle. I let go of grievances and choose miracles.”